You should see what I'm doing to your stuffed animals
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
Sign #1 this conference will suck: Ice breaker question, how many proud virgins do we have in the room, overwhelming response. Looks like I'm not getting laid this weekend.
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
I think we need to stop being best friends, its not good for our vaginas.
You act like I'm the first person to try and hook up with a blind chick.
He offered to drive me out of state to meet up with my fuck buddy. Like best brother in law ever.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
I need to stop smoking. I just talked to corn.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
OH. MY. GOD. FUCK HIM. JUST GRAB HIM AND FUCK HIM.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
My 19 year old brother just hooked up with his 45 year old cougar kindergarten teacher. These sorts of situations make me realize why the sorority girls call him Wondercock
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
He gave us beer and shots and made us pizza in his brick oven before firing a handgun into the air to signal it was time to give us a ride in his inflatable raft to the bars.
He's like a mythological figure
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