You work out of a Hotel?
I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
He asked if it was my vagina. I told him it was my butt. Clearly I need to buy him a map of the female form.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
i was holding a cup in her face for her to throw up in while screaming THIS IS THE DEFINITION OF FRIENDSHIP
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
You throw up behind 1 mannequin and it's world war 3 in forever 21
Have you ever hotboxed under your comforter? Best. Decision. Ever.
Stop talking and go back to bed. You're in the kitchen in your underwear and slept in your car.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
Randomize