she was wearing a cheetah print one-piece and i slept with her anyway. big mistake.
she just waddled down the stairs behind me and puked and kind of reached for me but i sped up. does that make me a bad person?
The more I throw up, the more I am remembering exactly what I drank last night...in order.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I just passed a truck with its bed lined with a tarp and filled with water with six dudes chilling in the back driving through campus. That looks fun.
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
It's like you know you got fucjed up when you wake up and check fir your own pulse
Glad I can drunkenly remember to not get tomatoes on my Mexican pizza but can't tell a guy to keep his hands off my ass
I found a new button on my vibrator, tonight was a success
I melted cheese on my pizza rolls. When I die make sure someone melts cheese on my rolls.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
Randomize
