somehow, due in part to drug cocktail and alchl prior to meeting, i blacked out, got home, made total mess of kitchen, broke shower, and made 17 hard boiled eggs
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
I am not saying a eulogy for your vibrator.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
I threw up in a mitten on my drive home. Wow.
I might have been the first person to be rolling balls at a referee seminar
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Do you think accidently including this month's Credit Card statement in my application will keep me from getting into grad school?
Depends ... when did you purchase your vibrator?
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
I miss you.
Yeah, I don't want to have sex.
Soo I'm in the trunk of a car drunk about to jump on trampolines. My life rocks!
I just learned that the grill marks on a Burger King burger patty are actually previously burnt on there with a radioactive spray-on liquid and McDonald's french fries are actually 5% potato.
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