Ps what kind of horrible ppl are we that we both checked blackberries during sex and neither minded?
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
There are not one, but two women wearing my boxers on the couch right now. You need to wake the fuck up.
His penis has a special gift of curing my broken heart
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I face planted right in front of a cop. He looked at me, shook his head, mumbled "freshman" under his breath, helped me up and told us to get home safely. I love college.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
I didnt think the feeling of accomplishment for fucking brothers would be this great.
The wizard has you scheduled for a 6am sex breakfast
I'm so there
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
We need to make tonight low-budget
Is this your way of suggesting flasks?
Did we seriously just get into a fist fight over kit kats?
I'm two shots in and wandering around Barnes and Noble with $58 in singles.
Also if i get drunk and start crying about the elephants you all have my permission to abandon me.
Randomize
