Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
it was nice. we just kind of hung out. she didnt even mention the farting incident.
woke up in a freezing tub of water at 6 am again. probably should stop the drunk baths
Important life lesson - flammable and inflammable mean the same thing
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
Uh yeah can we get an age of consent check on Dave's penis?
Age of consent, Dave's penis. Thank you...
I am drinking fireball and apple juice out of a sippy cup like a fucking toddler.
He signed my ass with a Waffle House pen.
the fact that your 21st birthday is also new years eve is pretty much a death sentence
Who cares if he’s younger, he’s hung like a moose. Your vagina will never forgive you if you pass on that dick
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
Randomize
