i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
theres no point in washing my sheets anymore. its always going to be a fine layer of booze and semen.
The saltiness of my tears mix perfectly with the tequila.
We went to his house and he brought a jar of pickles to bed. I think im in love.
You know, I never expected to find myself with a roommate who I'd have to ask not to have sex while I'm in the room. And yet, here we are.
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
She kept biting his ear when he was talking to people, that was only 3 drinks in...
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
Would it be sharing too much to tell you that my nipples hurt so much that I couldn't comfortably go down the stairs?
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
Just recreated a sandwich from the caf in my own kitchen. Graduation denial at it's finest.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
First dip in a brand new jar of Nutella, and my man’s dick are two things I will not fucking share.
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