i just made my gag reflex go away.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
I'm buying eyelash glue, salt, and limes. We know how tonight is ending.
Check out this gay circle: I've now hooked up with my ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend, my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend, and most recently my ex's ex-boyfriend's ex-boyfriend's ex-fling.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
so hungover. i just puked at the sight of the beer emoticon you sent me.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
i cant believe we used adam and eve as a sexting theme last night
Just got to her place. Her parents are here and are high as a kite.
Her father just game me a high 5 as they left the room. Her mom leaned in and said "this is a rebound thing"
You went in the back with her.. And honestly I couldn't tell her neck from her tits man..
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
I wish drunk me came with subtitles
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
Randomize
