the other night i did but this one wasnt and it was so random. i was hooking up with this boy who wanted to roleplay and pretend to be snakes
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
He's got serious oatmeal ass...take a moment and admire how google voice to text was able to detect oatmeal ass....twice
I don't remember what happened but judging from the contents of my pockets it had something to do with potatoes and glo in the dark condoms
Even the paramedic said "what a way to kill a party"
I want him to rain dance my fallopian tubes.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
i'm gonna fuck his crew, i'm gonna wax my asshole. i'm gonna make them all cry tears of sex joy then move to colorado.
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I just gave myself a foot massage. #SingleAsFuck
You were lost on foot. Texted us and told us that N*Sync couldn't save you, and then you "met Jesus" in your car.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
would it be awkward if i bring my husband?
only if i fuck you in the bathroom while he's paying the check
Randomize
