Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
You're gonna have to start calling my house phone from now on
How come?
Cuz 'Dad' looked pretty similar to the word Dane when i sent that picture message
if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
If I brought two seashells to Lowe's, do you think that they'd drill two holes in each shell for me? I need to be a mermaid on Saturday...
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
Gooodnight my beautiful sex angel. Much luvz for joo, etceteraz
I loved your drunken rendition of "I wanna dance with somebody" that you left on my voicemail last night.
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
I'm just high and in my robe and I would suck a dick for some pizza rolls. I can't talk about your problems right now
Aaaaand then she sang MDMA to the tune of the YMCA song, with appropriate gestures.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
yeah...that's gonna come up in court
You said you were uncomfortable with your body and then you started making whale noises
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
Randomize
