Dude, I couldnt get it up cause she said her parents were home...
ok, come over...I have doritos
I think im going to throw up on grandma
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I tried to go shot for shot with some guy called "shit show martinez"
we've already established he's totally wasted. but now he's just sitting at his computer, doing i don't know what, and he keeps saying "dammmn girl" in a really low whisper
I briefly wondered why they weren't in school, but after the tinier one shouted "check out dem titties!" I had my answer
debating whether or not to save the package from my first plan b pill. it would be a nice addition to any baby book.
Just wanted to remind you that you literally cut the underwear off a man.
It's my diet secret . . . it's like slimfast but I call it cockfast instead.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
this ms. usa coverage has sucessfully humbled every girl here. depressed fish in a leaky barrel. go!
How am I so hungover that wearing sunglasses hurts my head?
I've got beer and a bag of saltwater taffy and croutons, is that enough for this typhoon thing?
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
Randomize
