No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
Ryan Howard.... the only guy who struck out more than me this weekend
so i was just informed that i sang that song "pop that pussy ayyy pop that pussy" at the halloween party saturday. iembarrassing.
i guess its officially winter break. i woke up alone and fully clothed this morning.
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
I'm just gonna be the bigger person here and say I want you inside me
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
Apparently it is frowned upon to ask the bouncer to stop pointing his flashlight in your face and step back so you can puke....and then do it
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I couldn't do it. You can't break up after that many orgasms. It's physically impossible.
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
I probably shouldn't be taking relationship advice from my side piece...
WELL I DIDNT KNOW IT WAS POSSIBLE TO COME SO HARD YOU HAVE AN ASTHMA ATTACK BUT HERE I AM
All I wanted was to die alone with my dogs....how did I end up here
I don't know if I should laugh or punch you
lol show me an arrest record and I'll drop my panties
Randomize