how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
I typed "housewife" into monster.com's search engine....I got zero results...kinda bummed
Let's pretend this is a good idea before I change my mind.
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
His balls looked like two miss shaped chicken nuggets
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
Ok so I didn't mean for his first impression of me to be lying face down on his roommates bedrooms floor throwing up my jäger but it happened. Atleast my ass looked good in those jeans. Think I still have a shot?
well, mom whipped her new boobs out at the dining room table. So yeah you could say we had a pretty casual thanksgiving
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
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