Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Idk. I woke up marinating in beer on my beanbag. Idk what you mightve done.
do we own a ladder
We do not.
then how am i on the roof
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Well he just said "there's glass on the floor and it's okay I'm only bleeding out of my esophagus" so yes he's tripping
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
unless you have a dick and you were thinking of chopping that off
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
The selfie stick gets 5 stars bc it really added a fun element to my sex tape
I feel like I shouldn't be encouraging my friends to hook up with their teachers.....but if it's for academic reasons....then I definitely encourage it.
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Can you face time me. I need to know if this pill is xanex or ecstasy
You tried to lick the lightbulb and fell off of the chair onto my wife and gave her a concussion. Did i mention you were naked?
Randomize
