Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Just found a picture of me licking the bouncers ear last night
They asked if I was about to puke and my response was to laugh and suddenly throw up. Continuing my asshole streak I kept laughing while still vomiting.
I promise not to drug you or anything. Please come to my birthday party.
I'm a busy girl. All I wanted was noncommittal sex a few times a week
All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
Sorry my phone died. Obviously four o'clock in the morning is a good time to tell you this.
We've been together for 10 months. These next 2 may be a deal breaker. He has not met the summertime version of me that is so hungover today that I cancelled a meeting with my boss right after she sent me an appreciation note saying I have great work ethic. I have her fooled.
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