no, there's no challenge. I live a humble lifestyle out of virtue.
You wear Armani Exchange.
Thanks for ditching me last night. I got a ride home from the Dominos delivery guy. You owe me 3 large pizzas.
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
you have no chance. her best friend is a human abstinence poster.
We've been here 3 hours and the only 1 word answer she didn't give was the drink order. Don't think I'm getting laid tonight
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
well i fell out of the hot tub and tumbled down the hill and kicked a plant in the process.
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
I tried to talk to him, but he didn't recognize me at first. I had to show him the top of my head and then he remembered.
Just blew a guy who had the same phone case as me. It was destiny.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
Like, I don't need to know your life dude. I just need you to suck my tits.
Calm down I'm not kidnapping the bartender
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
