Sooo i definitely have a major burn on my chin from kenny's ...stubble from making out for hours while coked up. Pure class.
yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?
New level of high: If I could bathe in my salsa right now I would.
Walking in to my alcoholic Assessment meeting with a black eye = 40% awkward 60% awesome
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
The bartender had to walk me home last night. New high or new low?
She told me "I think I'm going to puke tonight" a few seconds later she said smiling"I can't wait!"
He's good looking but he really sounds like kermit the frog, can you imagine how fucking him would sound like?
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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