Do you remember when I jumped into your arms and you farted?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
So there's 10 guys in this picture..I've made out with 5 of them. does this make me a slut?
eh 50% isn't bad..i'd say 80% is slut material.
I can't believe you're fucking in the bar bathroom, but everyone else can, and they're really proud.
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
If its allowed to Tornado at 830am then Im allowed to have a beer and a cigarette at 830am
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
We tried the hang n bang, remember? You ruined it by crying and telling me you loved me while blowing me.
I'm still laying in bed cuz I don't feel like adulting yet
Getting a blow job while breaking up with my gf helps cope with the pain... Kinda weird her best friend is giving me the BJ
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I just watched a squirrel take down a snake,life isn't so bad after all.
drunk me always erases text conversations because she is a woman of mystery and does not like for me to know what's going on in her life
Step one: We finally agreed on an au pair that we both wanna fuck.
Randomize
