Why would I want to inherit a sex machine used by my grandma?
This girls' body was nothing short of spectacular...her face, was like the '09 Detroit Lions
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
scarred for life. way too high and witnessed some chick give a dude head on the dance floor
If I die tonight and was cremated, you could probably get high off the smoke.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
I'm going to miss hockey season. It was the best excuse to get drunk on a Tuesday night.
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
after attempting to eat a candy cane bigger than my hand i have determined there's no way to eat this that doesn't seem erotic
She has that type of face she reminds me of that weird girl from napoleon dynamite only taller and with hoop earrings.
I can't decide if I miss drinking or you, they are so closely connected.
Randomize
