Omg! Love it! Cant find L*****
What!!?? Like after last night you lost her?
Yea me and L***** came back to out hotel at 3am to regroup then went back out; police and 2 bars later, I don't know what happened. Vegas is nuts!
Woke up with feathers in my hair. at work. still drunk. sooo awkward.
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
buying my parents vodka for Christmas is like buying a normal person socks.
You puked in the drive thru of Taco Bell. You puked as it was being handed to me. You managed to yell out "FIRE SAUCE" in between hurls.
then he compared my vagina to a dishwasher. A DISHWASHER?!
I just realized I turned down a booty call too. To make cheesecake. God help us all
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
We also had rum, but now that's all gone. Which I feel is appropriate for a pirate party.
It looks like a baby bear tried to chew off my nipples.
Got really high to see my fist college experience unfold. Too high to find my classroom but I found the McDonald's down the street
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
Quote of the night award goes to my father "I like wearing my swim trunks around the house because they are cooler and more blousy for my balls". Yay dad
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