Until that no good dick sucking whore stays away from my boyfriend I am gonna start blowing all of his friends...
I'm going to die alone in a sea of empty vodka bottles and cats.
Apparently Bin Ladens last act of terrorism is cock blocking me....
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
Also my vagina isn't a crater of death where nothing comes out
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
I could definitely fill a shot glass w my cum
please don't
Serious concern: will TSA confiscate my bondage rope?
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
Wow. Memory lane. What a horrendously unsightly jizz stain on the tapestry of life.
Dude, he paid us overtime to smoke weed out of a bong at his house
We turned his nipples into a drinking game.
How did i spend $200 last night?
Every time you went to get me a drink, you also came back with shots. Then you fell down the steps.
Randomize
