windsor, ontario is like a poor man's amsterdam
no, it is just poor
he was in the bathroom singing "will it floooaaat?? will it floooaaat?!" turns out that's a deal breaker for me.
But guess what. I'm gonna roll over and go to sleep cuz there's no cuddling in phone sex.
Next time we go to the river, we nominate you to flash people for free booze. Your tits are the biggest.
This needs to stop. I just vacuumed the wall. Adderall is a double edged sword.
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
I don't have nearly enough visine for the dryness from sticking my head out the window on the freeway for 20 minutes. Child lock me next time.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
You know whats not fun? Making yourself throw up on a sand dune at 4 in the morning.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I miss you more than I would miss junk food if I went on a diet. And you've seen me eat, you know how desperate I'd be.
Don't underestimate her when she starts going by "the vodka queen"
You were just so carefree! People were like, "there's broken glass everywhere" and you were just like, IDGAFFFFFFF
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
