Nothing says "This dudes gotta go" better than a boner on your back waking you @ 5 in the morning
Just wanted to make sure that my favorite hot mess is still alive. I dont need words, just a response of any sort. K hope youre living
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This is sufficient.
It's cute how he thinks we're going to have sex again
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
i just found out the cashier has a picture of my junk in her phone.
I really want to shower but i'm afraid i'll sober up. My mouth feels like a stripper pole too...
Lucas & I had a photo shoot with her cape & I had child arm floaties on most the night.. woke up in a spiderman bed
Hypothetically how does one go about throwing away a dildo?
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
In the words of my step grandma "whatever makes your pussy happy"
CALL ME OLD FASHIONED BUT PEE IS FOR TOILETS
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
So then I got so stoned I sat and took my pulse for 10 minutes.
Randomize