pshh wine cellars. now if he has a tequila cellar whole different story
At the Phils game. My gay buddy just wanted up to a bunch of Mets fans and said "I'm gay, and even I think Mets fans are a bunch of fags." I love this fuckin town.
fuck. I just remembered I agreed to let you finger me last night for solely for "scientific purposes"
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
We found a swing set....it's in the front yard.
And dont forget my 23rd birthday where with no underwear i crawled through the cage of the police car. Dont get drunk be fore you get drunk.
And I just had to awkwardly tell 3 police officers that I was having sex and not in any trouble
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
They put paint on their hands and tried to see how many times they could touch me before I woke up.
Judging by this purple one they got to second base.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
You're talking about alcohol when the smell of hand sanitizer is too much for me right now
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
my hair smells like a mixture of fireworks and rotten eggs with a hint of shame. it's so strong it's keeping me awake.
Thanks for loaning me your shower and panties. My hubby is awesome, but I shouldn’t go home commando, smelling like lube and sperm again
Randomize
