but i really can't criticize. i blacked out waaaaaay ahead of schedule.
Only now do I see "not intended for use on skin" warning. Wonderful. But hey, my dick smells like magic marker.
your address is 607B right?
yeah why?
i need to tell the guy bringing over the flaming bag of dog shit where to put it
I don't think so, think I've only met him once, the night I lost my teeth
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
the cops were hovering over him then shinned a flashlight to the floor above ours, then I realized that some fucker jumped from the third story.
fuck our hall.
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
Found my other fake eyelash. In a condom wrapper...
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
We got buck wild in our animal onesies last night. You kept ripping off your tail in angry rages.
I found my soulmate. Behold my idiot as we spaz into the sunset.
I'm sending lingerie pics that I took yesterday. I fully prepared for this holiday
Remember last NYE when after the 9th shot of tequila you went on full crazy mode and made out with the 50 y/o doorkeeper? and he called you the next day?
Everyone should just give me a copy of their keys. I take your dog out and I bring beer.
This is a hot dog holiday. I intend to do my part for the processed meat workers of this great union.
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