Kelly went into her room with Dave, but is moaning Tommy...
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
the power's out. i'm smoking weed by flashlight
i wish i was dedicated to anything like you are to weed
theres bread in your mailbox im going to eat it
nevermind its newpaper
is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
America approved of our night. A bald eagle flew over us at 7am
I kind of want you to get arrested just so I could frame an avatar mugshot.
He told me he breastfed 'til he was six. That explains the obsession with me getting fake tits. Is it a red flag?
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
i just saw you make out with a girl with facial hair...just thought i would document that in case you forgot
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
She's the one that asked you what my favorite color was & handed you a piece of bacon
When you guys came back from the bar, I thought everyone was a T-Rex - Thats why i was hiding under the table. Never doing shrooms with Drunk people again
Your heart isn't making stupid decisions... your penis is outsmarting your brain. Stop fucking her!
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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