that was a gay-test. you passed.
with flying rainbow colors i hope!
I'm sitting here watching a kid lick a basketball- where have i gone wrong in life?
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
So I just found out that my mom and dad arent married
What? They have three kids?
Yep. And apparently I have a half brother. Happy Birthday to me
You weren't a difficult drunk to take care of. I just had to stop you from plunging the toilet once or twice.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
I'm so confused. I feel like I just intentionally took roofies to see where I'd end up.
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
I was weirded out when the chunky goth girl and her boyfriend both started eyeing me and wanted to by me a drink.
the people next to us at the red light cheered for you while you puked out the window...
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
So I think my neighbor's name is Olli if I'm hearing the girl the girl he's fucking clearly
Should I wish him a happy birthday?
Well he has been inside of you enough times that you probably should.
Randomize
