Do you feel like you missed out a little from not getting crabs in college?
You probably shouldn't be hiding under someones bed listening to them get head
so just incase you wake up on the couch wondering how you got there--you came home at 7am, put ice in a cup--then you proceeded to put the cup in the microwave and melt it because you "wanted water". you then, fell down the stairs while saying "you don't know me" then crawled to the couch.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
the blizzard started in kansas. im debating driving to a bar now so i can get snowed in there for the game
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
So Monday we're lesbians.
Deal. This decision is final and any rebates on this will result in losing an eyeball.
Put down the bong. Turn off Hey Arnold. Stop calling me football head.
I love you football head
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Really though. It's your life, live it how you want
And I do mostly. Which is why I'm now drunk in my room writing erotica
We broke the bed while I was handcuffed to the headboard and let's just say that was a hard one to explain to the RA
I got off F O U R times, just because he wanted to hear me moan. He is my hero.
like honestly, the vodka had to go somewhere, and your moms soap dispenser just seemed right at the time..
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
Wait you took his virginity AND broke his bed doing it
I know! I’m the best!
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