My whole home page is your drunken face booking, congrats.
New favorite sorority...they made me pancakes in the morning and welcomed back the walk of shame girls with a round of applause
I sold my books for weed money!
Finals don't start for a week...
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
trust me, there is no more disappointing feeling in the world than waking up at 4 in the morning with a random half naked chick in your bed and then realizing your roommates girlfriend just wandered into the wrong room.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
Things are burning & the world smells of peanut butter. It's beautiful.
I'm chatting with a girl missing a front tooth. I find it quite distracting. I'm sure you have deduced what bar I'm drinking in on this monday night.
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
God I need to stop before there's a picture of my dick on my mom's phone.
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
My neck is sore from all the headbanging. And I can't tell the difference between the jello stains and cum stains.
Rough birthday weekend. Eating McDonalds in the shower and used a fifth of sky as a pillow last night
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