Dude, I'm so high in the forest and I think I'm in a bear den.
Guys are so much hotter at OU. Come my mating season, I am flying south like the geese in the wintertime.
y-o-u-r-e = you are, y-o-u-r = your. you are a bag of douche not your bag of douche. if you're going to insult me at least do it in proper english. that is all.
Note to self: Don't teach the naked lap rule in beer pong until after youve made a cup..
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
I'm way to drunk for this play. I'm about to run up on stage and drop the main character
Just made a list of all the guys I've hooked up with. "Roofie tattoo eyelids", "xanex night guy", "rainy concert", "cory blanket" and "naked hottub guy" made it.
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
Sometimes the gods of alcohol choose to take you on a mysterious journey and you just have to go with it
He's bringing a lesbian pretending to be his girlfriend to family Christmas. I can not wait to see how this goes.
And I'm laying here struggling with the notion that I need to put pants on.
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
oh.. my GOD my dad just text me... "i need a naked women" ........... help?
might I remind you I fucked a 21 year old and almost did coke with strangers? you definitely came out on top
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