he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
BROstal carolina. Watching a boy drinking rum and coke out of a cup of noodle empty cup.
you know that annoying kid in my psych class? accidentally hit him in the face with a door today. perfect end to the semester.
I walked into the bathroom and the toilet was on fire... I stood there for like a minute trying to decide whether I should put it out or get my camera.
After what u did to that bathroom I think the $30 and the "sorry I'm a jackass" note was the thing to do.
I shouldn't have had sex with her. I feel that I may have opened a pandora's vagina
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
100% of annual heatstroke fatalities are preventable deaths! Don't let it happen to you! Also, you can catch crabs from almost anything! Be safe and have fun.
I think I've officially made out with the entire starbucks staff.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
In 30 minutes I will have been sober for an entire month. Time for a celebratory lap of cheap alcohol that leads to early liver failure.
But happy liver failure. That's what counts.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Is there such thing as a tasteful dick pic? I think I just got one if they exist.
Randomize
