I just woke up in the back of his van. Bring me a sunkist.
erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
my mom just served us mashed potatoes with an ice cream scoop. When I asked her why, she said she thought it would make dinner 'more fancy'...
Bartending School is so much more enjoyable now that I realized I was in rehab at this time last year.
Alls I remember is making out with that chick.
Nope that was a dude
jake and the teradactyl broke up, operation get high and find him a new girl who hasn't had sexual experiences with three delts simultaniously is in full effect.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
You need to be full form and virile tomorrow so I can live vicariously through your rub and tug.
It's official. Those are now your come fuck me flipflops
You said you brought chipotle into a movie and I asked you to marry me and you said yes
You were mean to me and you broke my heart and hurt my feelings. You dont get to talk to me about Peter Dinklage
That moment when you can't decide if you should vote for the random frat guy you have head to at the beginning of the semester for business and technology senator.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
If it involves notarization or the Misfits, I am up to date. Anything else, I know fuck-all.
My dad just informed me that I may be entitled to $1700 worth of stimulus money... looks like that hitachi is coming sooner than later. Let's hope for the best!
Randomize
