it sucked. he totally couldn't get it up. blamed it on never having cheated b4. Couldn't stop laughing. fuck.
Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
I wish I could save this moment forever and have sex with it regularly. Its just tht beautiful.
I woke up to him climbing naked through my bedroom window with a bottle of jd in his hand. Of course I had sex with him.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Can't wait to bequeath this flannel to my grandchildren someday.
'I've been using this to pick up lesbians since before you were born!'
Not at all! I'll let your potential employer know you have a huge dick
Appearently I went across the hall last night demanding to ride my neighbors moose... How much did I drink?
No. There is no way we have to stoop so low as to ask your dad for weed. There has to be an alternative.
Moms love me. I'm the reminder that they need to turn safe search on.
Just deepthroated a hot dog. Thinking of you
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