the only girl from my high schools graduating class coming to our school next year went stag to prom and still has braces...
dibs.
My face is bruised from laying on the concrete. NO MORE VODKA!
I want you to come here and listen to her climax and then tell me how funny you think it is.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Guys with values who care about your personality don't cum on your back the 2nd time they you sleep with you.
Its summer. Time to get to the freshmen before the weight does.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
we turned the lights off and all you could see were my glow in the dark stars and his penis
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
we were having a conversation about big dicks and the chick at the table beside us turned to us said "me and my boyfriend just broke up a few days ago. Could you please NOT talk about big dicks"
Can't meet up at the party. Gary was caught by the cops attempting to drop a deuce thru his ex wife's Subaru via sun roof. Details as soon as bail is processed.
i ate pretzels. i might be the first human to be hospitalized from pretzels. that's how bad this is.
thanks for passing me through your vagina 20 years ago today. your the best
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