We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Learned a lot. Like boys with frosted tips still exist. And that they're sensitive to constructive criticism.
is it wrong that I want a "Where The Wild Things Are" tshirt that points to my junk?
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
hows the party?
ists fjcssing insceredle
be there in 10
Things found in my vomit last night: cell phone, Von Hayes rookie card, a boot, my dignity
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
We would have taken you home with us, but you were outside the bar measuring a randoms stream of piss by walking along side it... you said you were only at 32 feet and it still had a couple of grooves to hit.
I tried to convince the Lobo Card people to take my pic with my sunglasses on because I will probably always be this hungover.
shes making a cheerios necklace using dental floss 'just in case' she gets the munchies later
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
Puked in my purse on my Uber ride home last night. Safe to say it's not a good idea to beer bong a whole bottle of wine.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
