how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
why is allison so mad at me??
me and her walked into dans and you yelled "hello my dear alli, you're looking mighty overweight today!".
crap..
I only have two new blunt burns this year as opposed to freshman year's 6. This is growing up.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
I let a guy with dreads drive my car, then demanded he take me back cause I don't let strangers drive my car, while repeatedly apologizing for being a cock block.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
I made $80 at the club last night by telling him he was like a wild pony and I just wanted to tame him
If your plan is to re-bang every girl you banged in high school - you're gonna need a spread sheet and clip board.
one more hour of this work bullshit and I'm off to get high with your cat.
Crying while I'm pooping. I think this is rock bottom
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Yeah everywhere i go i feel like a 3rd or 5th or (2n+1)th wheel. That's right, i'm a mathematically depressed drunk.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
Randomize
