so they made cookies with their faces printed on them...I ate jaime...she tasted like poop
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
I just witnessed someone getting head in the parking garage. Don't ever tell me Baylor is too conservative again.
is it STILL halloween? when did this turn into a week long holiday
she's sitting in the bathroom of SA telling people to come in for a toilet ride
Just bc you put "its cute" at the end of it doesn't change the fact that u have called me a vag twice this morning and its only 10:03
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Just met my French neighbor. We watched a crow die together, so we're pretty tight.
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
Randomize