Hey look on the bright side if youre preg at least you know it and wont have it in a toilet
You said you didn't deserve to walk so you started crawling down to your room
worse. her friends hid in the bathroom while she gave me head and then screamed surprise right as i was about to cum
Registered for next semester classes drunk. Let's hope I didn't accidently sign up for history of dinosaurs again...
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Sometimes you just need a break, and sometimes you also need to get stoned on these breaks. I sound like some kind of fucked up mr rogers when I say shit like that.
Beer coozy in the gym. Don't judge me.
How many people can say they've shit on the floor of a five star hotel?
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Dude that chick had a dog in her car. Like when she goes bar hoping so does roofus. He gaurds the car.
I'm just drunk enough to be eating egg rolls on the toilet
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
We got high, had sex, and watched retro scooby doo shows. Best friends with benefits yet.
Randomize