Grilled cheese is the best thing. ever. better than boys, and alcohol, and sex, and chocolate, and money. But not really the last two.
When we ran out of red solo cups we switched to Starbucks cups for beer pong... Who doesn't want to live in Seattle?
I passed out in the stadium during the 4th quarter and you guys just left me there?
Yea, but we put money for a cab in your pocket.
So take that alcohol. I still win. I ALWAYS WIN. Plus i didn't have to wear clothes. DOUBLE WIN.
Well, when you bump into your parents at a swingers meetup, it's time to change cities
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Living alone for four weeks has given me unrealistic expectations of pantslessness.
IN OTHER NEWS did you guys see Orlando Bloom's penis today? I did
SpongeBob is life. I once broke up with a guy bc he said SpongeBob was stupid.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
I danced my ass off after the funeral last night. Kept dropping it low and I can feel it in my legs today. Im like shit I needa go work out
What a way to honor the dead
Dude come over...were drunk and I'm holding a T-shirt gun and discovered beer cans are the same size as rolled shirts.
I just put on the jeans I was wearing last night and pulled 4 baby carrots out of my back pocket....
Wtf did i hit my head on?
Tequila
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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