He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
I wish I could test you the smell I just had to experience. It smelled like this lady was microwaving squirrel rectum.
There was something that i liked about you, but you spent it
Everything about him screamed your future.
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
Chelsea handler, $19 million - Forbes women top 100. Seriously she shaped her career around her love of vodka. HERO.
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
... Already stepped in vomit and got a dirty look from a fat in a neck brace
He was barking to the beat of "I like to fuck" and then chugged 3 beers and fell off the deck.. I should have gotten community service hours
My head is pounding and I need an ice pack for my vag. Successful friendsgiving!
Wet should excavate the hamsters out of the front yard n give them a proper burial.
I'm here. Help me get the salsa and bong inside.
Dude, the worst part is I can't even pretend it didn't happen because she posted a video of it on Facebook.
It's OK, I woke up in a drag queen's bed last weekend. It took me forever to get the glitter out of my cleavage.
Randomize
