I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I'm driving behind a lime green VW that has "Seniors '10!" shoe polished on the rear window. i haven't even seen her yet, but I do have a boner.
Revenge fucks should not count towards the total number. They're justified.
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
She told me my pubes were as soft as "fine wool"
you dont understand this isnt a sit at a sports bar eating wings and having a beer night. this is a show up to the bar with a fith of Jack and just let what happens happen kinda night. im expecting to smack a bouncer
Ok let me change into clothes i can run in
You shouldn't do laundry high cus pink.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
You told us that you don't have to wait in line at Taco Bell. Then, drove up to the window and grabbed someone else's food.
And I'm glad you're waiting to invite him over. he may have a weird penis thing and then dinner becomes awkward.
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
Not bad. Ran into Carlo. He shared a story about a sailor who got gonorrhea in his eye. It made me feel better about myself.
Randomize
