I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
we better have passed that bar exam - i dont want to have to drink like this again
Oh no. He has the "I'm 30 years old and I just shit myself in public" face.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
I don't think requesting him as a BBM contact is proper protocol following vomming in his bed.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
she asked him to cuddle cuz she was cold and instead he got up, moved the space heater to her side of the bed, and went back to sleep
you are never too drunk for berry picking
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
The only monogamous relationship I can keep is with my eyebrow lady...
HE WAS CUMMING IN THAT DICK PIC
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