In hindsight maybe we should have moved his homework instead of playing quarters on top of it.
i took a field sobriety test yesterday. a crowd gathered, watched me pass it and applauded. then the cops arrested me because i took a bow and fell over.
I know you didn't add your TWO random hook ups from the weekend to your FB friends AND change your status to "Good Catholic Girl" on the same day.
Our professor just said "No class today, go get stoned." A guy seriously walked over and hugged him.
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
just peed on my foot to get a spider off. that lazy.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
Dry heaving on campus is my new low. Also, go pats
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
I just left and he walked me out and went call me if you're ever... Eh... Whatever. And walked away.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize