She said I was really immature but whatever...oh by the way we just bought a toilet and turned it into a beer bong so come over
Actually, all he talks about is how great the sex is with her and how crappy you were at it. Stop being a bitch and gossiping masking it as self-righteousness.
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
Is it just me, or does Colt McCoy look like Herbie the Dentist from "Rudolph the Red-nosed Reindeer"?
i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I saw him coke blaxckout on the subway at 9 this morning yelling at people callig himself the gatekeeper.
You are mentally unprepared to be exposed to my degree of perversion.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Obama's speech on in 9 mins. Me in the shower now. Naked. Make your choice.
I'm bringing the tv in with me.
By cross-referencing our messages & her Twitter feed, I've deduced that she was eating spaghetti the whole time we were sexting.
literally just tried sending to someone a video of me jerkin but my phone was connected to Apple TV and it literally just played on the tv in a full room and I'm actually about to shit myself
Sex to movie scores is my best choice of the year. You've had an orgasm but have you had an orgasm with an entire orchestra.
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
So I have a horrible yeast infection right now and I learned that Scott is cheating on me and now he has a yeast infection in his mouth and in his stomach a pretty aggressive one too. I believe the doctors call it thrush. Text me in the morning tell me what you think.
Randomize
