I think there's some kind of asian convention downtown. There are thousands and they're all wearing badges and snapping pictures. I feel like I just stepped into your worst nightmare.
i'm in his phone as sushi coochie
96 perecent sure i just took a shower with socks
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
She sat on the stairs and yelled sex positions at us. I don't remember if we went along with it but judging by the beer and condoms I'm thinking yes.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
Like you haven't hit rock bottom until you have had to throw your own turd out a window
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Fuck it. I'm going for it. You're only young once, right?
You've been saying that for 5 years now. Let me know when the novelty wears off.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize