smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I judge my drunkenness on my brickbreaker playing skills. I'm winning. Suck it.
He fingered me while we both sang the fresh prince theme song.
Marry him
they could make at least 3 episode of "i shouldn't be alive" out of my weekend
You're always adorable, but when you're drunk, you're like Chia Pet adorable.
The last thing i remember is saying breakfast beer and carrying the keg to my room and locking the door.
i sound like a 75 year old homeless man that has spent all his panhandling money on cigarettes since he was 12. that rough.
I'm about to do the walk of shame in a christmas onesie. What would I do without christmas sweater party season?
All I saw was a purple blob and poking out from under was part of a green shirt. Took me a minute to realize it was him under that beast.Thought I should ask if he was actually breathing and conscience but then I saw him slowly exploring what few brave men have done before.
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
So your brother is gay after all... Just caught him making out with my brother... Apparently he's gay too
Me and Jason had to grab your legs and arms and drag you in the house. You kept screaming "leave me for dead"
I woke up naked in this guys bed and the first thing I start saying is it's super bowl Sunday like I was yelling
Her ex was at the party her housemates were having. He knocked on her door asking how she was while we were going at it. Turns out they were trying to work things out. Don't think I'll ever forget his face when we walked out of her room.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
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