If I were a boy, I'd name my penis Reptar.
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
I checked into jail on foursquare
Im really high right now and the vending machine is broken and giving out free candy. Please kill me, my life will never get better than this
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
looking back it was a good thing we were too wasted to fire up the chainsaw
I know you hold the fastest time for "zoo downhill wheelchair racing" but I don't see what that has to do with this.
the gays at disneyland are vicious
Let me know when ur ready so I can throw up one last time then brush my teeth
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I was behind him snuggling, I told him I was the big spoon and he told me I was too little it was more like he was wearing a backpack.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
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