Hawaiian shirts and no dignity
We are always on the same wavelength...kinda eerie.
Can you tell me why I have pubes stuck in my teeth?
Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
SANTA'S REAL. I GOT MY PERIOD.
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
Oh god the guy I took underwear from at the bar is trying to add me as a friend on facebook now.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Ok more importantly someone in a chicken costume just stepped in front of my car and started breakdancing...
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
Now accepting any stories about my adventures last night, in particular why my knuckles are bleeding.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
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