We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
Tell mom and/or dad that I am going to be home late. I am really blazed. Don't tell them that part, though.
So chef boyardee smells exactly the same after you throw it up
i literally discovered the exact same thing last week. i had the lasagna one
ravioli
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
Remember that time I hopped home naked from the bar, then tried to convince you I was ok to drive you home? Good call on the taxi.
Am I supposed to confront my 52-year-old boss/mother of 3 about the fact that we matched on Tinder?
I can't hookup with a guy in my car because it smells like Taco Bell..
Our drunk hook up was interrupted by the delivery guy. When he came back to my room we ate the gyros and went back to sex like we didn't take a lunch break.
I'm sorry I threw a frog in your car last night.
I forgot what I was gonna say, but I'm pretty excited to not be pregnant.
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
I am high. And my mom surpised me today. Now i am high and with my mom....bad idea
Randomize
