This guy has a retainer. We're golden.
First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
She called me Jeff during sex, I just kept going like nothing happened. To think, if I was a woman that would be a problem.
So, apparently, "i expected your penis to be bigger" isn't good pillow talk.
I yelled "Coming in hot." before penetrating. Im pretty sure she loved it.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
I love flavors. My neighbour is owide smoking and so am I. I'm adio boooooored and I need an adult.
So were u tired or drunk when u wrote last night's text message?
pills.
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
if I was any more soft right now, my penis would be a liquid
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
fuck whipped cream. I'd eat vegetables off those abs
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
we need to open a bar. a bar with... wait for it... A FUCKING BALL PIT.
LOL. Do you guys need a ride home?
No. we're home already. i just thought it was a brilliant fucking idea.
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
