Just watched my manager erase "we've been 2 days wo an accident" and change it to "0" these ppl are too high.
I wish I had a waterproof laptop so that I would watch porn in the shower.
I finally beat you i just fucked my professor last night!!!\n\n
sry, psychiatrist trumps professor
whenever I think of his sister, I just picture a chick with a huge beard
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I think I'm going to make a pina klonopin before class.
So, sleeping with all of my Vicodin in my bra because I knew she'd be searching my room for drugs tonight. I'LL SHOW HER.
Who wrote "the chamber of secrets has been open, enemies of the heir beware" across my bathroom wall?
That guy is like a clown car of sexy. Just when I think I've seen it all, THERE'S MORE.
AND SOME IN THE TRUNK.
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
You asked for his ID and then said "I am like a bouncer but for my vagina."
I called you last night? What did I say??
That you love me forever and that I'm the greatest in the world now mohammed ali is dead...
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