sorry I missed your bday party.,I was vid chatting with that new guy I'm talking to all night...happy biirthday though
Not sure what happened last night, but there are four mini bikes outside and some guy is wearing my shirt passed out in the breakfast nook. Won't be telling the grand kids about this one.
i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
yay america 4th of july drinking game. take a drink every time you hear or see a firework, finish your drink for a mention of mj or the gosselins, a shot for the words democracy,hope, freedom, terrorism
Any girl that compares her vag to a hot ham sandwich is beyond a slut
he kept refering to his penis as the "eternal sunshine"
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
I'm pre-party power houring. It's so catchy I couldn't not do it
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Steaks?
It's Ash Wednesday.
If you really think that not eating meat on a weeknight is going to keep you out of hell, fine. Can I use that chimichurri you made?
Seriously babe, why do I keep waking up with bruises on my nipples? WHAT ARE YOU DOING TO ME IN MY SLEEP?
Actually, scratch that, I'm not sure I want to know.
...I think I just watched a boy make a sandwich seductively. What.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
I’m at that point in my trip where I’m kinda hot, kinda cold and I have to remember to breathe.
Oh my god, my vagina is cursed. He's cursed my vagina so that no one but him can maintain a boner around me. I'm sure of it.
Randomize
